Sara (Hera)
Tautuku Orme
Sarah Rose. Auckland, NZ
I think my biggest struggle, especially at the moment is just that idea that I’m not good enough, or that I’ll never be able to reach my potential. That scares me a lot, so that’s kind of a weakness.
Social media is a great tool and platform for a lot of people, but if you spend a lot of time just scrolling and looking at what everyone else is doing, it kind of takes away from you and what you’re doing, especially around other people.
The first time I got into modelling there were very strict measurements, sizes, and everything. So for me being not small was really hard for me to deal with and that really made my confidence drop a lot. And it kind of became an obsession with ‘should I eat this, should I not?’ and it took me away from the things that make me happy and it shifted my focus onto the way I looked. Then in the end I actually got dropped from my agency. That was hard.
Towards the end of the year it got to a point where I was diagnosed with depression.
Everyone goes through things, and no matter how good it looks like you have it, you still go through a lot. So yeah with all that I really did feel like shit, and when I stopped caring about it was a very freeing thing, and I learnt that I am in control and I have power over how I feel and I can surround myself with things that can make me feel good.
Still everyone has their down days but I’m just very happy in life now and I enjoy life. I really don’t care anymore what other people think or I don’t care about trying to fit into other people’s ideals of what beauty is or how I should act. The way I dress is my creative outlook.